Monday, December 22, 2025
Summary
Jesse Watters claims Trump's building a White House ballroom 'monument' to himself. It's 'four times' the White House! *Honk!*
Full Story
🧩 Simple Version
Imagine a giant bouncy castle, but instead of bouncy walls, it's a super fancy ballroom! President Trump, with a sparkle in his eye (probably from a rogue disco ball), allegedly told Jesse Watters that this ballroom wasn't just for dancing. Oh no.
It's a "monument to himself," because, gasp, no one else apparently offered to build him one! So, like any self-respecting leader, he's building it himself, with help from some very confused construction workers and a pile of private donations. Boing!
The Giggle Spin
Picture this: Fox News host Jesse Watters, fresh from a meeting with President Trump, practically bursts onto the stage at AmericaFest, probably wearing an oversized novelty bow tie.
He's shouting about a super-secret, super-ginormous White House ballroom! We're talking a ballroom so vast, it swallowed the entire East Wing and now sends out postcards saying, "Wish you were here! My walls are made of pure ambition!"
Trump, in this wild scenario, rolls out blueprints like they're a giant red carpet, then dramatically declares,
"Jesse! This isn't just a ballroom! It's a MONUMENT! To ME! Because, let's be honest, who else would do it?!"
It's an architectural declaration of self-love, funded by mysterious benefactors who probably thought they were investing in a giant, opulent, presidential ball pit. HONK-HONK!
Giggle Reality Check
Alright, let's untangle this glitter-bomb of a story. Jesse Watters, a personality on Fox News, did indeed claim at Turning Point USA's AmericaFest on December 20th that President Donald Trump had a rather... monumental vision for the new White House ballroom.
According to Watters, Trump stated the ballroom was intended as a "monument to myself," adding, "because no one else will." This alleged conversation occurred during a meal where Trump supposedly unveiled a "rendition" of the massive project.
The actual ballroom, a considerable 90,000-square-foot structure, is under construction on the former East Wing site. President Trump announced its updated $400 million price tag on December 17th during a White House Hanukkah reception.
He also confirmed that a federal judge had cleared the path for continued construction, which he framed as an act of "courage." The project, scheduled for completion by summer 2028, is reportedly being financed entirely by private donors, with President Trump himself contributing.
Meanwhile, a former Chief White House Historian expressed hypothetical "disgust" at this "palace" makeover, probably while clutching a portrait of George Washington.
Why This Is Hilarious
This situation is absolutely a cosmic joke file entry because it perfectly encapsulates the absurd theatricality of modern politics. The idea of a leader declaring an architectural project a "monument to myself" with a straight face (or a very proud one) is peak comedic gold.
It's like a cartoon villain announcing their lair, but instead of a death ray, it's a really, really big dance floor. The sheer audacity, combined with the "because no one else will" caveat, makes it a masterclass in self-aggrandizing humor.
Plus, imagining a ballroom "four times the size of the White House" just makes you wonder if they'll need tiny golf carts to get from the punch bowl to the coat check.